Newsflash: “Alaskan Bush People” is Fake!

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Radar Online is scandalized by one of Discovery’s most popular shows, Alaskan Bush People. For the uninitiated (which until recently included myself) I include the following description from the Discovery website:

Deep in the Alaskan wilderness lives a newly discovered family who [sic] was born and raised wild. Billy Brown, his wife Ami and their seven grown children – 5 boys and 2 girls – are so far removed from civilization that they often go six to nine months of the year without seeing an outsider. They’ve developed their own accent and dialect, refer to themselves as a “wolf pack,” and at night, all nine sleep together in a one-room cabin. Simply put, they are unlike any other family in America.. [sic]

Now, there’s plenty to be outraged about from simply reading the above. Who the fuck wrote this description and why the fuck has no one either on the network or production company side noticed the grammatical inconsistencies more than 3 seasons in? Is the family “who” singular or “they” plural?  This is some lazy ass writing and copy editing.

But, sadly, grammar isn’t on Radar’s radar. Instead the site claims to be indignant about the “fakery” of the Brown family. Having previously reported that the Browns lied about their residency to collect checks from the Alaska state government, the site now accuses son Noah of “lying to fans” about a woman he dated on the show. According to Radar

Hopeless romantic Noah, 23, goes on a date with a woman he claims to have met on the beach while visiting the lower 48 states— a stunning brunette named Karryna. But the outing doesn’t seem to be as random as Noah implies. The Channel Guide first identified Noah’s date as Karryna Kauffman — a San Diego, California, based model and actress! While it’s not clear if Kauffman was cast on Alaskan Bush People, she has starred in three films, including dramatic shorts Love in the Time of Flanneland The Song of Birds & Bees.

While I don’t work on Alaskan Bush People (or know anyone who has) I think I can safely say that, uh, yeah, she was cast for the show. Thus, by extension, it isn’t Noah who’s trolling the audience but the production company and the network.

Look, Reality shows will be Reality shows (casting fake dates is among our less egregious sins, but certainly one we engage in frequently), and I suppose I can’t blame Radar for going after clicks with this shit if viewers are going to continue buy the lie. At the same time, though, I’m tired of the media perpetuating the REALity myth. If we all stopped pretending then we could move on to truly newsworthy crap. Like Angelina Jolie working as a college professor. Wait. What?

 

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